There was a few loud snaps and then a cluster of louder cracks.... Silence for a second and then a low and sudden rummble sounding like hale. Then the loud scream from very angry mother, "Donny!" three boys then clumsily darted accross the lawn out the back gate.
The middle aged man lauphed hard along with a few others in the croud of people sitting down at what appeared to be a very nicely set up garden party / yard sale.
The conversation continued like this,
Oh my goodness! That is horrable.
Oh don't worry, they didn't harm anything. They were just small fire crackers... I do find it interesting how they were able to get all the acorns out of the tree though with so few...
Oh,... No I meant about your uncle.
Oh, sorry. I am easily distracted. Anyway, I really can't say why there are so many of us who find inventing so enthrwaling. What is even more bizzar is that most of us don't want anyone to know who we are. Only a couple of us wanted to become famious.
Forgive me but that is kind of hard to believe. You have so much to offer, why would you not want to be atleast a little wealthy so you don't have to worry about money?
Oh, that. Believe me, we are not in short supply of contributing to the community. I personally only invent things that benifit living and efficiantcy... I try not to dabble in the latest greatest ground breaking stuff. As for money, we have enough to live comphertably within our means. When I was young, I was stupid and made alot if money and payed the consiquences too. Most of us learn that lesson. It's like clockwork. Once one of us makes something gigantic and mind blowing, it takes about a week before they shun ever having the idea in the first place. U would be surprised how much the government will be willing to use u and drain u of every happy bone in your body just to get something that doesn't exsist yet.
Would you mind anouther question? I just find this so amazing...
Sure.
If you could show me an invention of yours right now, what would be the best of them?
Hmmm... Good question... I can show you but you have to promis to keep it a secret... ( half serious look)
Ofcourse! We so promise! We won't tel a soul! Do we need to sign a paper or something?
Honey!? Please forgive her, she tends to be a bit dramatic.
(lauphter) wow you really want to know bad... ( a pleasing smile. No you don't need to sign any paper. I was just being a little dramatic myself. One sec...
Jasper?!
Yes? ( a small boy walks over with a clown nose on) Hi. ( the boy bashfully waves at the couple and hugs te middle aged man)
Jasper, I would like you to meet John and Madilyn. They are here looking at houses and might become one of our nabors.
Cooool! Do you guys liketo play board games?
Sure. We love them!
Great. Maybe we can play some time. Dad can I go watch the squirels? Mom saidthat they might bite me, but I will be carefull I promis.
I'll tell you what, if you take grandmas whistle with you you will be just fine. If one starts lookin at you funny like it wants your nuts, just blow the whistle really load. They don't like that. But please don't blow the whistle unless you have to. I don't want grandpa punching everybody in the face that is sitting near grandma.
Ok! Love u!
Luv u munchkin. ( the boy runs off to an old woman and starts to hug and talk with her). So, what do you think?
What?
My invention.
Huh?
Honey. It was his son. His son.
You made a robot?!
( huge lauphter insues)
Maddy!
Please. ( still giggling) that is quite alright. No, he is real. He is my most precious. He is my life. There is no invention greater and more special than my little boy. Becouse he is a miricle.
I think I'm going to cry.
Maddy... Hey wait a second. How did you know we were looking at houses?
Oh, that? That was easy. We are selling all the houses on this block that we just had built. You guys were the 17th couple that came to visit.
I knew it! You are rich.
Na, it was a favor from a land developer and his wife. I refused to get payed in cash for an invention I sold them so they decided to buy all this land and houses for us.
What in earth could you have invented to warrent that?!
That regretably is a secret. What I can tell you however is that they are happy again.
Would u guys like some lemonaid?
The end
Friday, June 19, 2009
An unexpected interview (part 2)
During a summer garden party / garage sale that was in the backyard of a mildly pleasing house an old woman spit out a drink in disgust and started yelling at what speared to be her husband. The husband just smiled like he was amused. After she finished yelling, he kissed her then she got up and started dancing to the music that was playing.
Their was a man sitting at a table with 2 kids trying to glue pieces of a model rocket together. The man held the shaft as one boy glued the last fin and the other placed it on the shaft.
Another man walked over to the table and this is how the canversation happened...
Excuse me, is your name nic?
Hey, I met u in the garage with your wife and that other lady. Are u having fun?
Yes, very surprisingly actually. My appologies for not introducing myself earlier, my name is John and my wife Maddy and I were wondering if we could talk to you for a little while after you were finished.
Really?! I would love that! Hey, guys. Put the other end of this upside down in this coffe cup with the cookie cutter on top. It needs to be straight to let it dry perfectly. Wait 1 hour and then com get me so we can stick the powder in next. You two can now go help aunt Diane win at scrabble. She told me that if she wins, she will take you two to get some ice cream.
The two readily put the rocket upsidedown in the cup and spead over to another table accross the lawn.
So, where r you guys seated?
Over here. Please understand, I apologize for being rude, my wife's grandfather was a tinkerman watchmaker and she wanted to pick your brain.
That is quite alright.
Hello.
Hi, my name is Madilyn and you must be Nic?
Yes, your husband said you wanted to ask me some questions.
Yes, I am very embarassed but I can't not just ask. I am a bit obsesive...
Really, you sound like my wife. It is no trouble what so ever. I would be happy to answer any questions you have. By the way, are u having fun? I always ask becouse some find it a little distracting with all the games, music, children and old people. You would really know that it was a garage sale.
Yes, it is quite cleaver. I love it.
Good. So, what questions do you have? I was wondering what kind of inventor you were.
( a big smile) I would be a dirt maker.
What is that? You don't actually make dirt.
It is a type of inventer that invents from other inventions. I take parts from other things to make something different, however I have been known to make some things from scratch.
What was te last thing you invented?
That would be a contained garden grid grower. I sold it to a guy in Salem that wanted a backyard garden to grow all his food so he could eat healthy. He had just suffered a quadrupal bypass and doesn't want to be eating anything he hasn't grown.
What exsacly is it?
It is a system of plastic tubes and funnals with ajoining natural furtalizer mixers every 12 feet that inject and imbibe toxins to reprocess a rich healthy soil. It is glittered by reflective heat plates up and down each row to magnify the uv rays that also acts as an insect diturant so pestisides aren't needed. I told me early last month that the watermelons he grew were the bigest richest fruit e has ever tasted.
Wow! How much did you sell it for?
( a big lauph) he took my wife, my son and I on his boat to Itally.
His boat? That is a really long trip?! Yeah, it was a really big boat. He sold it soon after.
How many patents do u have?
Oh, I don't do that. I don't need to.
What? Why not?
To me it is just a way of being selfish. I don't like being involved with the govenerment in any fashon if at all possible when it comes to inventions. I am thankfully not modivated to be rich or welthy. Family is more important to me.
Are their any other inventers in your family?
Well, now that is a question... I find it to be the most bizarre and fasinating phinominon I have ever been apart of... Just about every person in my family was or has been a type of inventer ever since the renisance. There were alot and are 17 now that I know of that don't want anything to do with science or invention.
How many are in your family? My cousen Mike said that currently there are 347 all over the planet. One of which is part of a research team stationed in Antarctica. But my great uncle is in the hospital currently and I don't think he has much longer.
I am sorry.
Thank you. He is a great man. He just smoked to much. Excuse me a second, hey Tom! Make sure Donny doesn't get into the fireworks box. I saw him eyeing it. I overheard him wanting to see how all the squirals back there would act like if he could get all the acorns to fall out of that tree all at once. Sorry. Family drama.
He has cancer?
Oh, um no. He was making an underwater rebreather for the government that extracted and separated the oxygen and hydrogen from the saltwater. It then processed it to breathing levels and usedt he hydrogen to fuel the electrolisis system as a form of perpetual energy renewal. The accedent happened after he left his lab and while he was trying to light his cigarette he walked out right infront of a bus.
End of part 2
-- Posted From My iPhone
Their was a man sitting at a table with 2 kids trying to glue pieces of a model rocket together. The man held the shaft as one boy glued the last fin and the other placed it on the shaft.
Another man walked over to the table and this is how the canversation happened...
Excuse me, is your name nic?
Hey, I met u in the garage with your wife and that other lady. Are u having fun?
Yes, very surprisingly actually. My appologies for not introducing myself earlier, my name is John and my wife Maddy and I were wondering if we could talk to you for a little while after you were finished.
Really?! I would love that! Hey, guys. Put the other end of this upside down in this coffe cup with the cookie cutter on top. It needs to be straight to let it dry perfectly. Wait 1 hour and then com get me so we can stick the powder in next. You two can now go help aunt Diane win at scrabble. She told me that if she wins, she will take you two to get some ice cream.
The two readily put the rocket upsidedown in the cup and spead over to another table accross the lawn.
So, where r you guys seated?
Over here. Please understand, I apologize for being rude, my wife's grandfather was a tinkerman watchmaker and she wanted to pick your brain.
That is quite alright.
Hello.
Hi, my name is Madilyn and you must be Nic?
Yes, your husband said you wanted to ask me some questions.
Yes, I am very embarassed but I can't not just ask. I am a bit obsesive...
Really, you sound like my wife. It is no trouble what so ever. I would be happy to answer any questions you have. By the way, are u having fun? I always ask becouse some find it a little distracting with all the games, music, children and old people. You would really know that it was a garage sale.
Yes, it is quite cleaver. I love it.
Good. So, what questions do you have? I was wondering what kind of inventor you were.
( a big smile) I would be a dirt maker.
What is that? You don't actually make dirt.
It is a type of inventer that invents from other inventions. I take parts from other things to make something different, however I have been known to make some things from scratch.
What was te last thing you invented?
That would be a contained garden grid grower. I sold it to a guy in Salem that wanted a backyard garden to grow all his food so he could eat healthy. He had just suffered a quadrupal bypass and doesn't want to be eating anything he hasn't grown.
What exsacly is it?
It is a system of plastic tubes and funnals with ajoining natural furtalizer mixers every 12 feet that inject and imbibe toxins to reprocess a rich healthy soil. It is glittered by reflective heat plates up and down each row to magnify the uv rays that also acts as an insect diturant so pestisides aren't needed. I told me early last month that the watermelons he grew were the bigest richest fruit e has ever tasted.
Wow! How much did you sell it for?
( a big lauph) he took my wife, my son and I on his boat to Itally.
His boat? That is a really long trip?! Yeah, it was a really big boat. He sold it soon after.
How many patents do u have?
Oh, I don't do that. I don't need to.
What? Why not?
To me it is just a way of being selfish. I don't like being involved with the govenerment in any fashon if at all possible when it comes to inventions. I am thankfully not modivated to be rich or welthy. Family is more important to me.
Are their any other inventers in your family?
Well, now that is a question... I find it to be the most bizarre and fasinating phinominon I have ever been apart of... Just about every person in my family was or has been a type of inventer ever since the renisance. There were alot and are 17 now that I know of that don't want anything to do with science or invention.
How many are in your family? My cousen Mike said that currently there are 347 all over the planet. One of which is part of a research team stationed in Antarctica. But my great uncle is in the hospital currently and I don't think he has much longer.
I am sorry.
Thank you. He is a great man. He just smoked to much. Excuse me a second, hey Tom! Make sure Donny doesn't get into the fireworks box. I saw him eyeing it. I overheard him wanting to see how all the squirals back there would act like if he could get all the acorns to fall out of that tree all at once. Sorry. Family drama.
He has cancer?
Oh, um no. He was making an underwater rebreather for the government that extracted and separated the oxygen and hydrogen from the saltwater. It then processed it to breathing levels and usedt he hydrogen to fuel the electrolisis system as a form of perpetual energy renewal. The accedent happened after he left his lab and while he was trying to light his cigarette he walked out right infront of a bus.
End of part 2
-- Posted From My iPhone
An unexpected interview (part 1)
It was a summer garden sale party at a rental house. A small family was moving and a realistate agent and 2 prospective buyers were at the house next door and noticed the elegant party in the backyard and decided to go visit to see if they could find anything they might like to buy. As they walked up to the garage they saw a middle aged man frantically searching through shelves of small appliences and electronis. They had to go through the garage to get to the party, so the sign said. Now saying this was a garage would be quite an undertatement. It looked more like a well organized warehouse. Here is how the conversation whent between the 4 people...
Hello? Do we go through this door to get to the garden party?
Oh yes. I apologize, I must have closed it on my way out. Here let me get that for you.
Holy crap! Are you selling all these things in the sale?
(short laugh) Oh no, that would take forever to move to the back yard. We are mostly selling furnicher and way nicer appliences than what you can see in here.
The three people just stood in awe as the man was holding the door for them.
Can I help you with anything? You guys seem a bit taken aback.
Well there is just so much stuff. It also seems that some of it has been taken apart. Do you fix things?
Yeah, some times. Right now I am looking for my last esspresso milk steamer. They don't make them anymore but they steam the milk perfectly. It is either in here or still next door at Miss Camble's. Here son just baught here some really good coffee last week and she wanted to try to make a latte with it.
I'm sorry, but I believe my wife was trying to ask you what your profession was. You do have an extreamly large collection of, well everything.
( a bigger laugh) um, i guess u could say i'm a handyman and when I have the time, an inventor.
Really?!
Yeah. Please forgive me, the party is just down the hall to the right and out the back screen door on the left. I really need to get that milk steamer.
The man slowly closed the door as the 3 just staired at him go back to searching the shelf he was last at. They mermered to themselves just out of ear shot and noticed the man comming back with a small bulbous metal steamer.
Did you invent anything in here?
Honey!
( a short laugh) that's quite alright. No miss. Not in here. Most of this stuff is just for parts, the rest is for, well, things that are needed every once and awhile. Excuse me, I really have to got get this to my brother. He is convinced that if he steams milk with un carbonated Dr. Pepper he can get my aunt to drink it and start dancing the polka. If you ask me, he's a little nuts.
( the wife broke out in a loud laugh and caught herself)
The middle aged man then went through the door and eventually the 3 others followed...
-end of part 1
-- Posted From My iPhone
Hello? Do we go through this door to get to the garden party?
Oh yes. I apologize, I must have closed it on my way out. Here let me get that for you.
Holy crap! Are you selling all these things in the sale?
(short laugh) Oh no, that would take forever to move to the back yard. We are mostly selling furnicher and way nicer appliences than what you can see in here.
The three people just stood in awe as the man was holding the door for them.
Can I help you with anything? You guys seem a bit taken aback.
Well there is just so much stuff. It also seems that some of it has been taken apart. Do you fix things?
Yeah, some times. Right now I am looking for my last esspresso milk steamer. They don't make them anymore but they steam the milk perfectly. It is either in here or still next door at Miss Camble's. Here son just baught here some really good coffee last week and she wanted to try to make a latte with it.
I'm sorry, but I believe my wife was trying to ask you what your profession was. You do have an extreamly large collection of, well everything.
( a bigger laugh) um, i guess u could say i'm a handyman and when I have the time, an inventor.
Really?!
Yeah. Please forgive me, the party is just down the hall to the right and out the back screen door on the left. I really need to get that milk steamer.
The man slowly closed the door as the 3 just staired at him go back to searching the shelf he was last at. They mermered to themselves just out of ear shot and noticed the man comming back with a small bulbous metal steamer.
Did you invent anything in here?
Honey!
( a short laugh) that's quite alright. No miss. Not in here. Most of this stuff is just for parts, the rest is for, well, things that are needed every once and awhile. Excuse me, I really have to got get this to my brother. He is convinced that if he steams milk with un carbonated Dr. Pepper he can get my aunt to drink it and start dancing the polka. If you ask me, he's a little nuts.
( the wife broke out in a loud laugh and caught herself)
The middle aged man then went through the door and eventually the 3 others followed...
-end of part 1
-- Posted From My iPhone
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